First Dratf
Nurdan Doğan
( Argumentative Essay )
SHOULD
SCHOOLS PROVIDE MORAL EDUCATION FOR YOUTH, OR SHOULD INSTRUCTION IN VALUES BE
LEFT TO PARENTS ?
Morality is to make good
behaviors with one’s own desire and to stay away from bad behaviors. Child’s
family is the important element in moral education. Moral education is a long
and difficult process which lasts from birth to death. Child’s moral education
starts at birth. A newborn baby is in need of love, trust and attention. To
meet these needs in a healthy way is important in terms of the child’s moral
development. Furthermore, peer relationships, school life, and the mass media
play an important role in the moral education of child but this task falls to
family primarily. To give a good moral education, children should be trained by
their family according to child’s development terms. Child’s moral development
stages is extremely important.
The first step of moral
development is an infancy period. During this period, the child's sense of
right and wrong, is that just how child feel about the good and bad. The second
step is the period when children begin to walk. In this period, children learn
"right" and "wrong" are told by others. In the third step,
during the pre-school years, children begin to internalize family values as
if they were their own values. They begin to perceive the consequences of
their own behavior.
Fourth step covers the period
of 7-10 years. The distinguishing feature of this period is to begin
interrogating the child's parents, teachers and other adults’s infallibilities.
Children have a strong sense like "should be made" and "should
not be made" in this period. In the fifth step which covering pre-adolescence
and adolescence years, children give importance to peers rather than adults. By experimenting with different value systems in the
buddy system, they will try to find the most suitable one for himself.
Especially, in this period, we must direct our children to people who knew religious
and moral values and advise them to establish friendships with them.
The biggest responsibility
falls to parents before someone else. Families should be a good example and
model for child. They must have certain principles in moral education of the
child. Nice behaviors should be endear such as justice, fairness, generosity,
being true one’s word, patience, gratitude. Likewise, children should be kept
away from bad behaviors such as cruelty, lying, mockery, vanity, slander, envy.
Families must have a balanced discipline. Reward and punishment must be used
correctly. Children should be followed at the school.
There are also school’s role in
the moral education of child. Teacher and teacher’s communication with other
children in the class affect moral values. Teacher’s personality, attitude and
perspective to events it the class is more important than the theoretical
training. Children learn by modeling everything, so the first people child see
are teacher and classmates after the child’s family environment. The slightest
distinction made between children, the courses which taught shouting by
teacher, the teacher’s resorting to violence frequently will affect children’s
moral values negatively.
As a result, child’s moral
education starts at birth with parent. Community, environment, friends, school
shape child’s moral values. These factors must help to child for having good
moral values. Atatürk has showed that the importance of moral values saying I
like athlete’s intelligent, agile and also good moral. We must not forget the significance of the
moral education of children and youth for a peaceful family and social
structure.
1) Furthermore, peer relationships, school life, and the mass media play an important role in the moral education of child (punctuation) but this task falls to family primarily.
YanıtlaSil2) To give a good moral education, children should be trained by their (singular-plural) family according to child’s development terms.
3) They must have certain principles in moral education of the child. ---> You should not use "of" like that.
1)Families should be a good example and model for *child : missing article ( 3. body paragraph)
YanıtlaSil2)There are also school’s role in the moral education of *child: Subject verb aggrement and it is better to say children instead of child.(4. body parag.)
1) Child’s family is the(change article) important element in moral education (intro. paragraph)
YanıtlaSil2) Child’s moral development stages (subject verb agreement) is extremely important.(intro. paragraph)
3) During this period, the child's sense of right and wrong, is that just how child feel(subject verb agreement) about the good and bad. (1. body p.)
1-) (Whose child?- Use an article)Child’s family is the important element in moral education. (paragraph 1, line 2)
YanıtlaSil2-) To meet these needs in a healthy way is important in terms of the child’s moral development. (Infinitive or gerund ? ) (paragraph 1, line 5 )